Blue
by AprilOfTheStars
Summary: Just a short drabbe I wrote as a Christmas gift! Marvel Hanahaki disease AU. Bucky-centric, rated T for death. Probably could be K but I want to be safe. Pairing Steve/Bucky. Sort of. The whole point of hanahaki is...just read it, you’ll figure it out.


**So I wanted to publish something for Christmas, and here we are! Probably not my best work, because the concept of this story was adapted from an old drabble I wrote ages ago. But anyway, have a short Bucky-centric one-shot! Not much to say, except I don't own Marvel. Merry Christmas! If you don't celebrate Christmas, happy winter holiday!**

The first few petals weren't as bad as he had imagined. They were delicate petals, such a bright and beautiful blue that the soldier could barely believe that he had just coughed them out. And they were almost painless. He hadn't been expecting that at all. The disease, titled Hanahaki, wasn't as rare as expected, and Bucky had seen a few cases before. Each time, the victim had coughed blood with the petals, and they had described great amounts of throat pain. He had none of that.

Bucky had known him for two years before he started coughing. Steve Rogers. The skinny kid down the block, always starting fights he couldn't finish. Bucky was always playing peacekeeper, but Steve had a big heart, and he was good company. They became friends fast.

Then the war started. They both enlisted, as expected, and Bucky was notified that he would be leaving Brooklyn later in the week. When he met up with Steve, he immediately noticed that Steve didn't have a uniform like his. He consoled his friend, of course he did, but there was an odd feeling in his throat. Later that day he coughed up two lovely tulip petals. He had immediately deduced a problem: if he was found to have hanahaki, he would be expelled from the army immediately. He vowed to hide it, even from Steve. Especially from Steve.

It went well at first. The disease seemed to be mostly based on his emotions, and he only had bad coughing fits when he thought too much of Steve. His smile, his dusty hair, his determined eyes...okay he might have had coughing fits more than he wanted to admit. But he (somehow) hid the illness from his commanding officers.

About a month after the first petals, the coughing did start to hurt. It was just a sore throat at first, but the pain quickly escalated. About two months after that came the blood. The petals, which were growing in size and number, were not as beautiful anymore.

Then Bucky was captured. Being tortured by Hydra wasn't fun, to say the least. The scientists figured out very quickly that he had hanahaki, and a few were more than eager to slice him open and poke at his lungs.

His rescue came just in time. At first, in the dark chamber, the soldier couldn't see his rescuer. Then the light hit him, and Bucky could see his face. Steve. Bigger, stronger, wearing a weird suit, but still unmistakably Steve. He only had enough energy for one trading line before the coughing overtook him, and he keeled over. The man's hand flew to his mouth, catching the flower petals before his friend could see, but Steve didn't miss the blood. Bucky was rushed out of the Hydra building and back into their camp so fast he could have sworn that they had teleported. But he was dizzy, and sick from Hydra's drugs and his unrequited love, and didn't pay much attention.

Soon he was allowed to go on missions again, and of course he was chosen to go with Steve. Of course he wanted to, he wanted to spend every day he could with the other man. But it wasn't exactly good for his health, and he was finding it harder to hide his illness.

And then he fell.

Losing all memory of a person apparently cures hanahaki disease. Doctors, take note. Bucky didn't see another flower until many years later, when a familiar voice said "Bucky?"

The blonde superhero, whom the Winter Soldier had never seen, lit a match in his mind. It was like dusting off an old painting, or

opening a previously sealed door. Slowly, his mind was opened to his previous life. He remembered the Commandos, his mother, Steve. And then he coughed, and out of his mouth fell a single, brilliant blue petal. The first in over fifty years.

Hydra wiped his mind so fast after that.

The second time his memories came back, the petals did too. Fast. On the run from the authorities, with his friend as his only companion, Bucky succumbed to the petals faster than before. Blood took weeks to come, not months, triggered by Sharon Carter. Bucky had known her Aunt, and to see Steve kiss her like that, after years of living her ancestor, seemed very wrong. Bucky held himself back from murdering her only because he didn't need to be arrested for any more crimes.

When he was frozen, he told Steve he wanted to protect the world from the Winter Soldier. He really wanted to protect himself from Steve. As he watched the glass frost over and felt the icy cold seeping into his skin, he desperately tried not to cough. A single petal forced its way up his throat. It froze in his tongue, blue and bloody.

He was unfrozen again to fight the purple alien. The Wakandan princess had cured him, and to her he was very grateful. But being unfrozen again meant the disease cams back in full force, and he almost immediately started coughing up full flower buds. There was no time to dwell on Bucky's condition, however, and he was immediately sent out to the battlefield. Fighting by Steve's side felt so wonderful, but it was painful as well. Bucky saw from afar as the alien snapped his gloved hand, only partially comprehending the action. To him it only meant destruction, but Bucky could feel death coming for him anyway. His last word was his life, his love, and his only regret.

"Steve."

 **So happiness was never in the contract. I didn't feel like making up a happy ending for Stucky today, so death instead. I bet you can feel my writing quality declining as the fic goes on. Also, this fic is unedited, because I wanted to post it today. Constructive criticism is always appreciated as well as reviews, favorites and follows. I normally credit Kenobi1 here, so even though she didn't help with this drabble you should still check her out! She writes great fics. Also, I will soon be posting a multi-chaptered Marvel fic, so look out for that! Once again, Happy Holidays!**

 **~April**


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